100!!

This is it! Yayyyyyyyy! I can't believe I made it! The road was tough, long, and certainly not easy to walk down, but I did it! 100 blog posts! 100 posts regarding the world all made by me. I feel proud. I feel accomplished. I feel relieved! I am going to miss this class and all the people in it, but I am happy to report that my obligation to it officially ends the moment I click "publish." Like I said before, I have every intention of starting my own blog after this is over. It has really helped me sort out how I feel about certain things, and I am grateful for that. Blogging is a great tool and is one that I think is almost necessary in this modern age we live in. To blogging! I am done! Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Thank you, and goodnight :)

Almost There

I am sooooooooo close! This is my penultimate blog post, and I have to say, I am relieved. It can be difficult to make the quota when you didn't space yourself out enough time to complete it. It has kind of driven me crazy to finish, but all in all I had a great time. I am trying to think of some pressing topic I want to discuss, but anything "deep" escapes me right now. I think I have learned what a great tool blogging is this year. I like to read blogs, but I never really thought of starting my own until now. I like just writing down what is bothering me through the day, and getting my head cleared that way. It is a catharsis, and it is a valuable tool. I don't imagine anyone is going to read by rambling, but it is nice to write, even if it's not for an audience.

What do we take away?

This class, though unconventional most of the time, taught us a lot about how we interact with people on the internet. One of my favorite discussions we had was about cyber bullying. It seemed to arouse a lot of anger in us, and no one was apathetic to it. We all agreed that there are certain dangers about social media, especially victimizing those that are of an impressionable age. Though most of us agreed that suicide seems extreme even in these cases, we all almost understood it. The internet allows us to have a connection to people 24/7. Unlike the "good old fashioned" type of bullying that really only happened during school hours at school, cyber bullying can last all day. It must be a terrible thing to go onto your computer, and read terrible things about yourself. That can be damaging to anyone of any age, but must sting particularly bad for young teenage girls. There has to be accountability, even if that means parents look over the shoulders of their children to monitor their activity. It may seem extreme, but it is better than letting tragedy happen.

High School

I was recently invited back to my high school to visit my teachers. I enjoyed every minute of high school as I had a good group of friends, good relationships with my teachers, and excellent grades. I didn't however, subscribe to the belief that these were the best times of my life. I always felt that there was so much more waiting for me beyond those doors. I knew I was going to go to college, prepare for a great career, and meet a lot of new people. I knew that the world was much bigger than the little bubble that is high school. I will attend my reunion with excitement, but I don't think I will ever yearn for those days again. I feel so much more free, with so many more opportunities. I always felt that high school was the launching pad, not the desired destination. I will always look through my yearbook and smile, but there is so much more to life than that.

Weather

I can't believe it is May already. I feel like the time has really flown by. With that being said, if I look out my window, I really can't believe it is May. It is dark, cold, and very Marchish. Two weeks ago, it felt like July, but now, it feels like we are stuck in winter again. Obviously weather patterns are cyclical and this cold front shall pass soon enough, but it does seem strange. It is odd to be thinking about summer so intensely when it feels so far away. I've needed an extra blanket and looked foolish wearing shorts yesterday. I was rather surprised when I stepped out in them yesterday, but refused to change them. I guess it was all a part of my wishful thinking. It has to be summer if I'm wearing this outfit, right?

The History Makers

As I've stated previously, I love history and politics because it really is just a study of the integrity of man. The events and circumstances are always different, but the characters of the men and women are what spark these events. No one told Martin Luther King Jr. to speak despite dangerous conditions surrounding him. No one told Rosa Parks to become an icon of the Civil Rights Movement. These are just two examples of people that were living in their present time, but creating history just by doing what they felt was right. I don't know a lot of people who possess such moral courage and determination. It takes very special people to make history. You have to believe in something, and at the end of the day, be willing to die for those beliefs. We should all be thankful for those brave people that are the mouthpieces for all of those that cannot find their voices.

Starting Over

This semester has been very difficult for me in a lot of ways. In fact, this whole year has been a challenge on every level. I have had to deal with both personal and academic challenges. The academic ones are easy enough. They are over once finals week is, but the personal obstacles stay with you. In my head, I always think "i'm done with this" but I never am. I want to walk away so badly, but I can't. Something is keeping me stuck in this situation that is just never any good for me, and I don't see an end to that in sight. Truth be told, I don't know if I want to see an end. I just wish things could be like how I wish they were. I wish that even if we only get one great wish granted in life, this one could be chosen. That is ridiculous, I know that, but it would be wonderful. I have been through it all this year, I feel like, but I try not to let anyone see it. I don't advertise what is going on in my life as I am a private person. This whole post must seem rather confusing, but it is okay, because I am confused too.

My Dad

My dad, as I've mentioned in class, is a Vietnam Veteran. He was a disabled American Veteran by the time he was 22 years old. Despite my being so close to that age, I know he was much more mature than I am at this point. War changes you, as he said, and you don't look at a lot of the things the same way you used to. He didn't really elaborate, as he isn't one to revel in the past, but I knew it meant he had seen things and done things that he'll always remember. He couldn't come home the same exact man he once was, because he was still more or less a boy when he left. I always try to figure out the defining moment when I've grown up. Truth be told, I'm not sure I've even experienced it yet. Going to war, however, is one of those things where maturity gained is undeniable. The stakes are too high, too many lives are lost, for anyone to come back the exact same person they were when they entered. I have such a respect for my father, because he doesn't resent his time in the Army, his injury, or anything else. He has always chalked it up to his duty for his country. I am so proud to call this man my father. He exemplifies bravery to me, and is the toughest guy I know.

In my American Theater class, we learn about how theater reflects modern life. Arthur Miller's The Crucible, for example, can be seen as an allegory to the Red Scare, while Susan Glaspell's Trifles is an obvious statement on women. Instead of going into a more "practical" field of study, I chose theater for the main reason. I love it. I am glad that reading these plays touches on the human condition, and teaches us about life rather than blood cells. Again, I don't ever dare to knock those that are studying biology or anything else, because I know that it is damn hard and rewarding. I just chose to stick with political science and theater because those are the two topics that I am very passionate about. I don't believe in slaving away at something that doesn't bring me joy, so I had to do what was right for me. I believe the best people in any field are those that clearly enjoy what they are doing.

Frantic

I am a little panicked at the moment. I should have been more diligent in my blog posting, but things happen as we all know. I am hoping that they again, aren't checked until 2pm so I may finish. I had the plan to finish them all this weekend, but the best laid plans...Anyway, I am rushing to finish up, then complete the million other things I have to do this week. I know summer is coming, but with all this work, and the chilly weather, I feel like I am stuck in March! I just have to keep fighting to get to the light at the end of the tunnel.

Second Life

Now that the semester is over, I don't think I will be engaging in Second Life anymore. All in all, it was rather creepy in my estimation. I didn't understand what the purpose of it was really. I can understand wanting to go by someone different for a day but this seems a little sad. We all do need an escape I guess, so maybe I am being judgmental and for that I apologize. I believe in the phrase "to each his own" so I know that Second Life is valuable to a lot of people. I personally don't appreciate it or its service, but I know a lot of people do. To those who will continue, have fun, but me, I am done.

Friend Requests

On Facebook, at least once a month, I get a friend request. I am always excited to see who it is, because at this point, I feel like I am friends with everyone already! I like it when it is a new friend from a different class or club, but more often than not, it is some stranger. I have had fifty year old men that I have no connections with try to friend me. It is disturbing, and I wonder why they chose my profile. Did they just see a profile picture of a girl and decided to add it? It can be very creepy to think about their motives. I never accept those that I don't know, but I wish people like that wouldn't friend me anyway. It is people like that that can make the internet feel unsafe. It can make you feel targeted and it is just uncomfortable. I think their should be boundaries that we don't cross. Luckily, most people understand those unspoken rules, and it is just a sad few that try and ruin the experience for the rest of us.

TV

Yesterday morning, I was up early so I put on the television. Luckily, one of my favorite shows of my childhood, Boy Meets World, was on! I already had the episode more or less memorized, but it was nice to watch. I had so much fun for that half hour reliving my youth. I think it is cool how little things like that could take you and transport you in time. I think most of us have fond memories of our childhoods, and a lot of little things remind us of it. If I have a certain meal or candy, watch a certain show, or play some game, I feel like I am six years old again. I am very glad to have grown up, but I do miss those carefree days...

Studying

So I have two finals tomorrow, one on Friday, and one on Monday. I am soooooooooo nervous, it is ridiculous. I think that I have prepared and will continue to do so until the tests arrive, but I am scared nevertheless. Pressure is one of the things college teaches you to deal with so I guess I am grateful for this, but it is hard to deal with in the moment. I know that real life is going to have deadlines like this all the time, so I had better get used to it now. Good luck to everyone on their finals!

Friends

It is the end of the semester and I feel like I only just started to make friends with a lot of people in my classes. Now I almost feel like it is too late to really get to know them because we will all be in different places next semester, I'm sure. In all of my classes this semester, I have been lucky to have fun people that help make the material more exciting and engaging. I hope that I run into all of them soon because I really valued our time together. Especially true for my friends in Theater 216!

Posts

So it is eight in the morning, and today all the blogs are due. Luckily, Professor Baldwin said he would check at 2pm so I still have time. It has been an absolutely crazy week! I know I am going to get it done, one post at a time! Wish me luck!

White Collar, Blue Collar

Despite "blue collar crimes" such as robbery being shown more often on television and in the news, it is certainly not the only kind of crime. Just because it is physical, it doesn't make it any worse than "white collar crimes," in which the crime itself is mostly done on a computer and goes undetected. Millions of people have been cheated out of hard earned, honest money due to the criminals like these. People like Bernie Madoff are even more guilty than petty thieves because the stakes are even higher. I hope that laws make these criminals pay to the fullest extent of the law.

Group Think

In my foreign policy class, we learned about the phenomenon "group think." People have a tendency to side with the majority, especially if their boss is included in that majority, even if they see things a completely different way. No one really wants to be the dissenting voice among a group of those who agree upon something. We discussed this when talking about the implementation of the surge in Iraq. It would seem that a lot of top advisors, despite later claims of disapproval, went along with the pack when deciding to increase the troop levels. The purpose of this post isn't to criticize or commend the surge, but just to focus on the effect that the group mentality can have even on a very large scale. I think it is pretty interesting that people at the top of the nation were susceptible to this, and kept their mouths shut on what they really thought just to fit into the group. I guess job security and staying on the boss's good side is a common motivation even at such a high level.

Rules

I don't know why I put in place so many rules for myself. Whether it be in regards to eating or studying or exercising or even sleeping, I can't just let myself be. I allow myself to only have a little of what I want or need, or I push myself to do more than I really want to. I find that I like feeling like I am in control of every aspect of myself. I don't like to leave things up to chance or let things just happen. I am afraid something bad will happen if I don't take the wheel at all times. For some reason, I also like to control things that shouldn't need controlling. Why do I like the idea of sleeping less hours than everyone else, or eating a little bit less than everyone else? When it comes down to it, I think that I just like to show what a disciplined person I am. I don't know why I feel the need to do that, because it just leaves me wanting more. As a goal for myself this summer, I am going to ease up on the rules I've placed upon myself. I am going to listen to what my body needs instead of depriving myself just to show I can. I think sometimes, my perfectionist attitude lends itself to my desire to control every aspect of my life. I am glad for the vacation because that means I don't have any stressful deadlines. I am going to relax this summer and be the best vacationing person ever (old habits die hard lol)!

A Photo a Day

I'm kind of obsessed with the idea of taking one photo of myself per day. If you search for these type of videos on YouTube, you will see that a lot of people do it. I think it is cool to see yourself aging, and realize that it really does happen over the course of several years, but those years are just a whole bunch of days tied together. When is the exact moment we started to gain weight, or our hair turned gray. When did we start looking old? Having a picture a day is a way we can actually watch the aging process in a slow way. It is just so fascinating. One day I am going to do this for a year and see how I've changed. If you look up the video "noah takes a picture of himself every day for 6 years" it is really cool. Also, "The Simpsons" did a spoof on it, and aged Homer for 39 years. Both videos are worth watching!